While many of us dream of staying forever 32, with gardens that remain vibrant and inviting, we also know gardeners who grow older without ever updating their gardens or decluttering their homes and yards. These spaces, to me, often reek of sadness.
How do things get out of control?
As we get older, our hand strength may decrease, making it harder to keep our gardens tidy. This can lead to shrubs and trees growing wild and uncontrolled. Meanwhile, stubborn grasses like Bermudagrass, which is everywhere in Oklahoma, can spread rapidly and choke out other plants. Fast-growing plants like autumn clematis and garlic chives can also quickly take over if not managed. We’ve all faced the challenge of dealing with invasive or aggressive plants that threaten to overtake our gardens. Gardening becomes a balancing act—finding ways to enjoy our outdoor space while keeping pesky plants in check.
Gardening as we age has its silver linings.
I realized I can’t garden the way I did thirty years ago, and honestly, that’s a positive thing. I’ve become faster and more efficient, gaining a much deeper understanding of my garden. I’ve improved the soil, honed my watering system, and learned which plants truly thrive here. I became a garden coach and help others garden better too.
To stay ahead of the Bermudagrass and other aggressive plants this year, I decided to downsize my garden. Recently, I joined Teresa Byington on the RoseChat podcast, where we had an enlightning discussion. It will publish later this month, and I’ll share the link then. She asked insightful questions about my downsizing, and I thought it would be great to explore that topic here as well.
How did my garden get so big?
I’ve been cultivating this space for 36 years, and when you give a plant lover 7.5 acres, you end up with a sprawling garden—or even several gardens. I loved having that freedom to explore and shape every corner, but I’m not 28 years old anymore.
Initially, I had 1.5 acres in cultivation, but it became clear that I needed to downsize to at least an acre. That’s still quite a bit of garden for one person, even with a helper or two.
Several events contributed to my downsizing.
I began gardening out of pure love for it, but I haven’t felt that joy in the process for nearly four years. It’s surprising, but it’s the truth. The ice storm in 2020 and the wildfire that swept through my neighborhood in 2023 took a toll on my passion. To top it all off, getting Alpha-gal syndrome from a Lone Star tick bite felt like the final straw in a series of unfortunate events.
I am much better now that I started taking Xolair, but I must still manage my energy level and stay away from mammal products. I’m also careful about high pollen days like the next few weeks of ragweed season.
I wanted to reignite my love for gardening by reconnecting with the joy and beauty that initially drew me to it. I aimed to rediscover the simple pleasures of nurturing plants and watching them thrive, focusing on what truly inspires me rather than simply the burdens of maintenance. By approaching my garden with a fresh perspective and renewed enthusiasm, I hoped to rekindle that passion and make gardening a source of joy once again.
How did we downsize?
First, I knew I needed some help, so I brought in professionals with machinery and strong backs. I reached out to Luz, the owner of Greenview Lawn Care. While he agreed to take on the project, he expressed sadness about the plants. I reassured him that I had already dug up and either given away, or relocated anything I wanted to save.
The rest I had to let go. They mostly ended up in a compost pile.
After we cut the back garden in half by removing the four long beds, we were left with the original two spaces inspired by Kitchen Gardener magazine. We also moved the fence to enclose the new space. We re-used all of the railroad ties and river rock for the paths. I’m letting the grass slowly grow over the reduced areas.
We also removed the two beds that faced the street. Before work began, I relocated any plants I wanted to save to the upper pasture or to other beds surrounding my log house. I even found a place for my pink muhly grass. It now lines the sides of the arbor leading to the back garden. I can’t wait to see it bloom in its new home!
Lessons learned.
One key lesson I learned during this process is the importance of staying strong and clearly communicating my vision. After two years of careful contemplation, I felt ready to embrace change.
This transition was particularly challenging for my husband, Bill, as he views the garden as a symbol of our relationship and the work we’ve done together. I gently reminded him that change isn’t always negative and that we still have plenty of space to grow.
For the first time in years, I no longer feel overwhelmed, and I’ve had the opportunity to make adjustments in other areas of the garden. I’m truly happy with my decision.
Have you ever considered downsizing in any aspect of your life? How did that experience turn out for you? I’d love to know.
Before I go, a bit of housekeeping.
I’m now writing newsletters here instead of continuing to blog at my website Red Dirt Ramblings. The blog archive is all there, but I’ve moved my current writing here. See my previous post for details.
I’ve also moved my current subscribers over here with me so that’s why you’re seeing this post. If you no longer want to subscribe, no problem! Just click unsubscribe, or contact me at nashgarden@gmail.com, and I’ll do it for you.
Thanks so much and feel free to share my posts. That’s how we’ll grow this garden together.
You inspire me to downsize! It is overwhelming at my age.
After 22 years in my previous house that had many beds to maintain I moved into a new home. While I love gardening I was finding less enjoyment of the maintenance side. Over the years it seemed like it was starting to rob me of my enjoyment of having gardens. I decided to do less gardens at the new place and at first there was some anxiety because downsizing felt like I had to confront the fact that I was getting older lol. But I knew I never wanted to lose my enthusiasm for gardening and I wanted more time to do other things and entertain more. My focus was just shifting. So I decided to
concentrate on the plants that I loved and bringing in some of those that were always on the wish list, mostly more native plantings. Now I go out and see insects/bees/butterflies that I’d never seen in my garden before. I’m finding that more rewarding than looking at just nice blooms. It’s a lot less watering and maintenance too.